Preface: Welcome to the inaugural Random Ramblings corner! I have been wanting to write on something like “this” for a long while, but I couldn’t really find the right opportunity to do so. Now as part of the site’s transition into v2, this corner will be one of the mainstay features of the site. Do note that this corner isn’t fixed on a strict (daily, weekly, monthly ) basis. In other words, Random Ramblings will be regular and irregular at the same time, oh the irony.
About: Random Ramblings is a corner where I share my thoughts on just about anything and everything. Of course it isn’t going to be “entirely meaningless rambling”. The ultimate goal of this corner is for readers to get a glimpse at my life experiences, my thoughts on a certain topic. And in that process hopefully they will be able to take away something valuable – be it inspiration, learning experience, or some form of insight.
I think a lot. Some might even call it over thinking. There’s just so much to think about, to talk about. Things that happen around you, they may seem meaningless or like a coincidence at a glance, but everything happens for a reason. (Yet another topic to ramble about!)
Yesterday, I got denied (yet again) – a chance to write for the same site in which I attempted the same thing a year ago (which is partially why this site exists). Today, I learned that somebody beat me to the punch was part of the reason why. The worst thing was, after finding (at this point in writing, guessing) who they were, that fellow was a person I actually “detest” beforehand. How could I be so sure? Well, you could say I’m rather perceptive, being able to deduce that person’s identity after a couple of hints and from my own observations prior. I won’t lie, this is a sucky, irate feeling that I dislike experiencing. I rarely “hate” anyone, and I have my own reasons for that, but nonetheless it was a hard pill to swallow.
However, instead of sucking it up and calling it quits. This incident only served to make me strive harder. From the words someone: “I may never be the best, but I’ll outwork anyone in my efforts to get there.” This sums up exactly how I felt at that moment. Facing a setback is one thing, but more importantly, how you recover from it is what matters. “Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.”
“Change what you can’t accept, accept what you can’t change.” I can’t change the fact that someone I dislike got there before me. I can’t change the fact that I have to wait for god knows how long again. This is the cold cruel reality that I have to accept. What I can change is to improve myself even further – to be even better than not just that person, but everyone else. What I can change is to push myself even harder – to outwork anyone in my efforts to get there. I can’t change the fact that these are negative feelings, but what I change do is to convert them into a source of strength.
Of course, I’m well aware that I might be saying all this in the heat of the moment. because this isn’t the first time I’ve experienced such a feeling. This flame that fuels my motivation will wane as time passes, but one thing is for certain – what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger (or weaker). Think of it this way, every time you face a setback, you bite the damn bullet and come out on top of it, you become a better person. Repeat that process and what do you get? That is how success stories are derived, how seemingly ordinary people climb to the top of the mountain. Others usually only look at someone’s successes and in their moment of fame and glory, but how many can claim to have witnessed their struggles and hardship? Successful people are the ones who work harder than anyone else, just because one doesn’t see it means it doesn’t exist.
“If you don’t dive into the ocean you never know how deep it can be. If you don’t scale the mountain, you can’t view the plain.” I know of people who are completely fine with not knowing what lies on the other side of the world, I don’t think any less of them for thinking that way. For me, there is this insatiable thirst to stand on the very pinnacle atop the world, to the point where I’m actually afraid of committing because I know that once I start, I don’t stop till I either reach the goal or self-destruct in that process. It’s all or nothing. Even as I type this I recall the things that I have to sacrifice in the quest to attain my goals – the price is a heavy one to pay.
Naysayers are going to say that I won’t make it, and I very well never may. However, it is better to regret something you did than something you didn’t. People around me have either attempted to dissuade me, or give me disapproving looks. I don’t blame them, because I know that the path I’m about to undertake is an unorthodox one, heck you can even say I’m relying on blind faith if you want to. I don’t consider failure an option, but I’m grounded enough to know that it is a possibility. Therefore all I can do within my own power is to try even harder, if 100% isn’t enough, give it 110%.
At the end of it all, what are my exact goals and aims? That is a question that I have been getting a lot, also a question that I have been asking myself from time to time. Honestly I don’t have a definitive answer as it isn’t something that I can easily give form to. Someday I’ll write it out in black and white, so that’s another topic for me to ramble about.
So..what is the moral of this story? From the words of the late Mr Jobs himself: “Stay hungry, stay foolish.”
Disclaimer: I didn’t write this to solicit sympathy, but rather it is intended as an avenue for me to expand on my thoughts and circumstance. Just saying.